Introduction
Personal lubricants are not just for people who suffer from vaginal dryness, but can be used by anyone. It helps to increase sensation and pleasure, whether you use it for masturbation, with a partner, anal sex, or giving oral. There are loads of different types out there to slip, slide and glide to "Sexual Happiness." It may interest you to know that over 70% of women find sexual experiences more satisfying when using a lubricant!
Lube is easy peasy to use. Just add a few drops, as much as is needed, and enjoy! Remember to top up when necessary. You can apply most lubricants on to the clitoris, vulva, inside the vagina, inside the anus, around the rectum and on the penis, sex toys and fingers and anywhere else you want it. (Some are not to be used with latex or silicone, see below for info.) It is important to use a liberal amount when using for anal sex and always re-apply when needed. Lubricant Applicators can be used to apply lube inside the vagina or anus if you have difficulty.
Lubricant Base
There are three main groups of personal lubricant. Water-based, Silicone-based and Oil-based. There are also creams and gels, but I will come to those later. It is not advised to mix different lubricants together.
Water-Based
This is the most universally used and versatile type of lubricant on the market. They are latex-safe and silicone-safe and can be used with condoms and sex toys. They can be used for all types of sexual pleasure, from solo fun to oral sex. It can be much easier to clean off fabrics and doesn't stain. Water-based lube tends to be thinner in consistency than other types, but the consistency can vary. Some thicker water-based lubricants can be great for anal sex. A lot of flavoured and warming lubricants on the market are water-based.
Silicone-Based
Please be aware that silicone-based lubricants are not to be used with sex toys made from silicone or realistic-feel sex toys as doing so can damage them. As a general rule, I avoid using silicone-based lubricant with most of my sex toys, as some of them I cannot be sure if they contain silicone or not. They are safe to use with condoms and latex though. You can use a condom over silicone sex toys and ones you are not sure about, to prevent damage to them.
Silicone-based lubricant is water-resistant, and can be used in the bath or shower without it washing away easily. This does mean it can be harder to clean off though. It is known for some women to report of irritation when using silicone-based lube for long lengths of time. But the main marvellous thing about silicone-base lube is that it is much thicker in consistency and lasts much longer than most water-based lubricants as it does not absorb in to the skin quickly. This makes it ideal for anal sex, and also for those who suffer from vaginal dryness. They keep everything slippery for longer and doesn't dry up. After a long length of time, it may become a little tacky, but generally, they stay slick for plenty of time.
Oil-Based
This type is no longer recommended to use for sexual intercourse. The oil leaves a thin coating inside the vagina and/or rectum which can lead to bacterial or other infections. They are also not safe to use with latex or latex-condoms. But they are safe with silicone. Oil-based lubricant should only be used externally, used for massaging or to lubricate external skin for slippery play. But also be aware that the oil can clog up pores and prevent the sensitive skin around the groin, underneath of breasts, armpits etc to get the air they need and can lead to bacterial and even fungal skin infections. This type of lubricant is very difficult to wash off though, as water will just bead and run off it. Wash well with warm soapy water. It may also stain and difficult to remove from fabrics and some surfaces. Some oil-based lubricants can be used for male masturbation though. Be wary of this type of lubricant.
Other types
There are also creams and gels available. Be sure to check the details of them and find out if they are safe to use with latex and condoms before buying. Creams and gels are mostly used for external use. Some gels can be applied to the clitoris for enhancing sensations, but be careful as some are not designed to be used inside the vagina.
Flavoured Lubricants
These are designed for oral sex only. There are a wide variety of flavours available to tickle your tongue from cherry to chocolate! These are great to help you give your man a perfect treat by applying on his penis and then licking or sucking it off. It can also be used for cunnalingus (oral performed on a female) by applying around the inner and outer labia and clitoris. Some people who dislike giving oral sex say that flavoured lubricant does help them to enjoy it more. You can use it to lick off any other external body part too, for a teasing and tasty foreplay. Also, you can freeze a flavoured lubricant in an ice cube tray to make flavoured ice cubes which are great for teasing ice play.
It is important to note not to use flavoured lubricants inside the vagina or anus if you are sensitive, as most contain types of sugars that can cause a yeast infection. However, Sliquid flavoured lubricants do not contain the sugars that are most likely to cause a yeast infection.
Warming Lubricants
These work by warming the skin on contact, the heat intensity often triggered by the contact of air on the lubricant, natural oils on the skin or by rubbing the lubricant on the skin. The heat intensity varies between different warming lubes and the individual using it. Simply blowing gently on most warming lubricants can increase and prolong the heat intensity. Some warming lubricants contain an ingredient called capsaicin, which is the active component in chilli peppers.
The most common use of warming lubes is to apply on the clitoris or penis, but you can use it on nipples, ear lobes and other erotic sensitive areas of the body. Some can also be used for massage, the heating action relaxing tired and sore muscles. Warming lubricant is not, however, suitable for anal application.
Cooling and Tingling Lubricants
These are much like warming lubes, but they give a cooling or tingling sensation instead of a heating sensation. They work in a similar way in that the intensity of the cooling effect can be increased by rubbing or blowing gently on it. The most common active ingredient in cooling and tingling lubricants is menthol or mint.
About Durex Tingle
There are people out there who are put off cooling and tingling lubricants after trying Durex Tingle lubricant. Durex Tingle originally contained menthol in a concentrated amount which caused a burning sensation during use. Since then, however, Durex has removed the menthol ingredient entirely from its Tingle lube and is now a menthol and mint free tingling lubricant which is much kinder to sensitive areas. Please do not be put off cooling and tingling lubricants because of past experiences with the Durex product. But be aware that some people are sensitive to it or just generally don't enjoy the sensation.
Cooling and tingling lubricants are more for female use than male, but it is perfectly fine for men to use it too. Using it on the clitoris can increase the intensity of orgasms and a lot of female orgasm booster gels, creams and balms contain some similar cooling properties (which I shall come to later.)
Anal Lubricants
These lubricants are specifically designed for anal sex. The anus is not naturally lubricated so it is always important to use a lubricant for anal sex. Most anal lubricants these days are water-based but with thicker consistency than general water-based lubes. This makes it last longer and need less topping up during anal sex. Some anal lubricants are silicone-based. These are designed for more advanced anal players, as they are much more slippery and yet thinner than water-based anal lube. This means there is more sensation to be felt during anal sex, because less of it needs to be used. But be aware of using silicone anal lubricant if you are not used to it, because it is very much more slippery which can cause penetration to be much deeper and faster than intended. Silicone-based anal lubricant is safe to use with condoms and latex, but it is not safe to use with other silicone products, so stick to a water-based lubricant if you are unsure of the silicone content in a butt plug or other anal toys when using them. Always be sure to go slowly during anal and if you begin to feel friction, stop and apply more lubricant.
Desensitising Anal Lubricants
These should be considered with care. Desensitising lubricants contain topical anaesthetic such as benzocaine or lidocaine which numbs the anus before attempting anal sex. I would very much discourage the use of this. The anal walls are delicate and can be torn during anal sex when not done properly. Anal sex is best achieved by being attentive to pain signals and if at any time there is discomfort or pain, anal sex should be slowed down or stopped entirely. If desensitisers are used, then you may not be aware of pain and damaged can be done to the anus. Anal sex, when done correctly, should not be painful. Pain only occurs when something is not being done right and should not be over looked.
However, some people may suffer pain during entry of the anus despite using lots of anal lubricant and going slowly. This can occur because the sphincter muscles at the anus are contracting and preventing entry. This can become a problem when the muscles cannot be controlled to relax upon the entry of a penis or sex toy. For this I would still not suggest using a desensitiser, but rather a relaxant. A relaxant can come in the form of lubricant, cream, gel or spray. They can sometimes contain a very low dose of anaesthetic, a lot milder than a desensitiser. These are used to help the sphincter muscles to relax and aid ease of entry.
If you do feel you need a relaxant, I would suggest the Pjur Back Door Relaxing Anal Glide Lubricant, which contains natural jojoba extracts for the relaxing effect.
Delay Sprays and Creams for Him
These are used to help men last longer during sex. They work by slightly numbing the penis and desensitizing temporarily so that you can hold off ejaculation for longer. Some contain natural extracts to give a mild numbing effect while others use mild doses of anaesthetic like benzocaine or lidocaine. The numbing effect does not leave you feeling nothing, but rather just reduces the sensitivity so that you can still feel pleasure, but not so much to climax as quickly.
The one major problem with these sprays and creams is that if any excess is left on the penis during sex with your loved one, it will cause the numbing effect on her sensitive areas too, desensitizing the vagina, clitoris or labia. This means that she could feel less too, leaving the effect pretty pointless when she is not climaxing as quickly either. Be sure that when you apply the spray or cream on to the penis that you wipe off any excess with some tissue paper and bin it. Be sure that there is nothing still coating the penis before penetration and follow the instructions on the label.
Orgasm Boosters for Her
These are used to help increase the intensity of orgasms and to increase sensitivity which may make it easier to reach orgasm. But they do not actually cause you to orgasm, as such, by using it. The effects vary from product to product.
Orgasm Boosters come in a variety of different forms, but most are in a gel or balm. There are also lubricants available with orgasm boosting properties which can be used inside the vagina like a regular lubricant. Most balms and gels should only be used on and around the clitoris and labia.
Some contain menthol ingredients which can give tingling or cooling sensations. You can use these on the nipples or other particularly sensitive areas too for added sensation.
Lovehoney’s own Bombshell Balms are becoming very popular and have now got three different types; mint, cherry and chocolate.
They all contain natural ingredients for orgasm boosting and the different types are scents to delicately enhance sexual pleasure through smell as well as sensation! I have the mint one myself and I must say that it does help to boost the intensity of sexual pleasure. The balms are not suitable for using inside the vagina and you only need a tiny little bit to apply to the clitoris and/or outer labia. A little goes a long way so the small tin lasts a long time. I find that the balm is far better than any gel I have tried, personally, as the balm stays where it is supposed to and doesn’t spread easily to other parts, like the vagina, where I find the sensations not to be too pleasant for me. But that is truly just personal preference.
Most gels work in a similar way, but because of it being a gel, it provides some slipperiness like a lubricant, so if you enjoy clitoral-only stimulation with your fingers or with a toy then a gel may be good for you. I have found that the Sliquid O Gel is rather good and as you only need a tiny bit, even a single travel sachet can last a few sessions!
Interestingly, some tingling and cooling lubricants (see info in the above section Cooling and Tingling lubricants) can also aid to boost female orgasms too. Some women report that warming lubricants help them achieve a more satisfying orgasm too.
Male Masturbation Lubricants
So, what is the difference between lubricants designed for men and other regular lubricants? In all honesty, the difference is sometimes not that much. Some companies find that different packaging works to help sell lubricant to men. Lubricant is often not something men think about since the common misconception is that lubricants are for women who suffer vaginal dryness or need a bit of ‘topping up’.
BUT this is not true for all of them. Some of the male masturbation lubricants are specially produced to help gain the best pleasure through masturbation with or without toys. The one major difference that can be found is that male lubricants are thinner than most others. Carefully created to give the least amount of friction while giving the best sensation, they can be almost watery and very slick. Other water-based lubes can be designed to be slightly thicker so that they last longer and need less topping up, but thinner lubricants can give the best sensation without so much lubricant in-between your hand or toy and the penis (or clitoris/vagina, as these can be used for female masturbation too). Stroke 29 lubricant is probably the most popular one around.
Glycerine and Yeast Infections (Thrush)
You may stumble across this when reading ingredients of a lubricant. Glycerine is basically a type of sugar used mainly as a preservative in lubricants. Unfortunately, this commonly found ingredient is known to cause yeast infections (or thrush as it is sometimes named) in some women. In the vagina, there is a delicate balance of yeast called Candida that is perfectly healthy. But using a lubricant product containing glycerine can cause the yeast to multiply out of control which causes a yeast infection. This can be easily treated by using over the counter medicines, but it is often best to visit your nurse if you have not experienced a yeast infection before or not had one for a long time. And is also a good idea to see your nurse or GP if you experience repeated infections in the space of 6 months.
If you are sensitive to glycerine and suffer yeast infections when using lubricants with glycerine in, then it may be a good idea to change the lubricant you use. Lovehoney always include information on their product pages (under “Full Description”) and will note if a lubricant is free of Glycerine, Parabens and Aspartame. (Those I will come to later.)
Sliquid lubricants are always free of glycerine and parabens and the range can be found on Lovehoney by clicking here.
Parabens
There is a lot of contraversy over the health risks of parabens. Parabens are chemicals found in a wide range of cosmetic products as well as some lubricants. They are used as preservatives.
Many studies have been done into the health risks of parabens and generally the bottom line is that they are 'potentially dangerous', so it is still debatable over how bad or good they are for you. But some studies have linked parabens to cancer. Parabens can mimic the female hormone estrogen which is known to play a role in the development of breast cancer. I personally opt to stay away from them where possible.
Aspartame
Aspartame is a low calorie sweetner that is around 200 times sweeter than surcose. It is the most widely used sweetner and also the most studied. According to the U.S Food and Drug Administration (FDA) there are 90 different adverse symptoms linked to aspartame. In fact, it is reported that aspartame is responsible for around 75% of all adverse reactions to food additives. According to some studies by physicians, there are a number of diseases and chronic illnesses that can be triggered or worsened by ingesting aspartame.
I have no desire to include any particular adverse affects of aspartame here, but you can find plenty of information on aspartame and its effects on the internet if you want to find out more.
Aspartame is most likely to be found in flavoured lubricants, but can be found in some other types of lubricants too. If you are looking for a flavoured lubricant that does not contain aspartame, then check out the ID Fruitopia collection, which are all aspartame and paraben free. (But unfortunately do contain glycerine)
There is also a collection of freezable flavoured lubricants from Touche, which are all glycerine, paraben and aspartame free.
Well. That is all I can possibly think of for this guide to lubricants. Now go out and have some slippery fun!
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